Grieving- the act of responding to a loss.

A moment of transparency- there are days in which I contemplate whether or not I can even do this.

I, like many others, have dealt with the depths of grieving, whether it be a loss of a failed relationship or the loss of a loved one. As of recently, my grieving was so heavy in which I stopped going to class and work. I was mean and angry. I would lash out at my friends at random times. I would cry in public, and most importantly, I stopped trying. I would lounge around the house, not comb my hair, and wear the same PJs for the week. I was helpless and, indeed, crying out for help. I was desperately looking for guidance in this process. I did not know how to deal with waking up and not being able to call my loved one. I thought there had to be a way to remove these feelings: medication or something. But In my finding, I realized that my feelings demanded to be felt. I found that it was okay to break out and cry or even scream; it was my way of responding to the loss. It is important to point out that you have to find your way of coping with a grievance. Some people like to focus on staying busy, while others like myself want time to feel their emotions. However you plan on dealing with your grievance, just know that it will get better, for I am proof of that.

The last thing I would like to do is to share what helps in my grievance.

1st- I allow myself space and time to cry, but after that, I tell myself I will get through this.

2nd- I try. So after I cry, I try to write or try to get out of bed.

*Key Takeaways: cry, try, and remind yourself that you will get through this.

I am stuck…

In this bad weather

for the winds have lured me in

they have caused

Me to swing left…

And right.

As I close my eyes

I hear something strange.

I hear you singing

but I know

this must

not be true

I have to be…

I must be dreaming.

Will I ever see you again?

I’m not prepared

for that day

So I beg of you

Please. Please

Please stay.

I need much more

Time.

But I know that this

time

I can’t have my way.